Thursday, December 29, 2005
The Evil Bush Administration and those W'ascally Terrowist
Yes, From the Same People who brought you Non-Stop Wall to Wall Abu Gharib Nekkie Pictures... yeah those ones... but were outraged by the "salacious" details of the Starr Report.
From the Same Peeps that want to keep us safe by telling Bin Laden "Hey Osama baby... we're soooo tracking your cell phone beoootch!"
From our Buds at the news desk that feel it's "Oh so important to fight the War on Crime by revealing where and which countries are keeping our prisoners!" (I'm feeling Safer already)
From the same Accurate... "verify and get it right"... Mainstream Media that brought you... Koran Flushing.
And from the same "America First" journalist that gave us "Bush Administration Approved Wire Taps!"
cough*so did Carter/Reagan/Bush1/Clinton too*cough
BUSH [Read: Evil] ADMINISTRATION SENDING KNOWN TERRORIST WHO WANT TO KILL US TO HORRIBLE MEAN PRISON CAMPS ON US SOIL
(Be Sure to check the Times Sunday Magazine... "Is it good for America to send Terrorist to Prisons and what does that say about us as a people?")
In another unprecedented move, *if you don't count the times Clinton did it* the Bush Administration, under a program known as Rendition, is sending captured terror... freedom fighters to US Super Secret Prison camps in third world states... namely West Virginia.
Your friends and watchdogs, the Mainstream Media, have uncovered *we got another Bush hater to leak to us* proof that terror... Jihadist lovers of Islam, are being housed in this Black Op's West Virginia Prison.
White House Press secretary Scott McClellan, admitted the policy of Rendition was being used but denied Torture was going on. "No Helen, torture is still illegal in West Virginia, however you can still marry your first cousins, but... let me clarify this point... you must be at least 13 years of age and have written permission from either your parents or siblings... or both if that applies." Said McClellan.
Senator Jay Rockefeller was asked what he thought about Combatants being sent to Prisons in West Virginia. The Senator was outraged. "How can we know what goes on there... has anyone ever been there? Where's the accountability? I mean, what do we really know about these... West Virginians?"
One punk ass reporter from... Fox Neeeeeeews *makes gagging motion* reminded the Senator he was from West Virginia. Hours later, Senator Rockefeller produced a Secret Letter he sent to himself that nobody else has seen but we're gunna report it as fact 'cause, we're good like that. The letter, according to "the Jaymeister" was dated before 2002, and in it "the Jay-man" expressed grave concerns about the President's plan for rendition... and first cousin's getting married. He also slipped us a couple of totally fetch "sweet seats" for an upcoming Nationals game so... it's all good... it's all good!